Dating rules in different cultures
When my grandmother dated in middle school (yes, middle school) her parents had one primary rule for her.The Primary Dating Rule: Don’t go out with the same guy twice in a row. She explained that the lack of exclusivity helped them guard their hearts and kept things from getting too serious too quickly. The lack of exclusivity helped the girls guard their hearts and kept the boys from feeling entitled to the girl.I am not convinced that anyone is ever truly ready to get married.Readiness can become a carrot on a stick, an ideal that can never be achieved.I explained what courtship was and quoted Joshua Harris, chapter and verse. “I don’t think courtship is a smart idea,” my grandfather said.“How can you tell who you want to marry if you aren’t going out on dates? I ignored their advice on relationships, preferring to listen to the young people around me who were passionate advocates of courtship.Dating was evil and Courtship, whatever it was, was godly, good and Biblical.My grandparents would often ask why I wasn’t dating in high school.
The Greatest Generation was encouraged to date and discouraged from going steady while in middle school.
It often had symbols like the girl wearing the guy’s letter jacket.
This telegraphed to everyone at school that she was “off the market” and that she had a “steady beau”.
Marriage will always be a bit like jumping into a pool of cold water.
A humble realization that you are not ready and in need of God’s help may be the more healthy way to start a marriage.